A Picture is Worth a Couple of Words?

When I was younger, my older brother and I loved to look through our family photo albums. I remember lying stretched out on the floor in front of an album (many of which are now falling apart due to over-use) and flipping through the pages recalling the stories that went along with each picture.

Oh look, remember the time we tied up Uncle Bill? He would chase us around the house with a toy gun and we would be all dressed up in our cowboy gear. Remember how we ambushed him and tied him up with our rope? It took him forever to get out of it!

Hey! There’s my first birthday party. The cake is in the shape of a lamb. Remember how Mom made that same cake for all of us for our first birthdays? She always made the coolest cakes. There’s the superman one, and the batman cake!

I remember when I got my first camera. I was very picky about what pictures I chose to take. I only had room for 24 on the film and I wanted to use it wisely. At the end of a roll I would carefully take it out of the camera (usually in my closet with the light off so as not to risk exposing the film) and store it away in the film canister. When I had saved enough money I would take it to the store to be developed. Two days later I would retrieve my developed pictures and open them as if they were some sort of treasure. I would look through them remembering each moment and savoring the memories. Then, into an album they would go, never to collect dust, but to be looked at again and again.

I have a digital camera now. As soon as I take a picture I can look at it and decide if it’s worth keeping. After I have taken a couple hundred I download them to my computer. I probably won’t look at them again any time soon unless I need to update my Facebook page. I’m thankful for the technology that we have that enables me to fully document our lives and more recently, my son’s experiences. I have probably two or three hundred photos of the weeks surrounding his first birthday. I hope he appreciates it when he’s older.

Most of our photos are stored on our computer. That’s much safer and easier than albums. But I miss flipping through worn album pages, reminiscing. I miss the time when each picture told a story, and each story was special. I don’t need to remember the story of the first time Gabe ate baby cereal, I’ve got 75 pictures of the ordeal. I don’t need to try to remember the story of his first steps, I’ve got a full-length video of it to speak for me. I am glad that we are able to document our important moments in life along with the mundane, everyday moments. But every moment is becoming so “special” that it is now worthy of enough photos to tell the story. The result: They’re no longer special.

 

You Are What You Eat

Gabriel tries to figure out how to eat this strange new food...

My husband recently asked me to buy more vegetables. I would much rather eat a carbohydrate than a vegetable, but I had to agree with him: we needed to make a change in our diet. Our summer schedule was such that we didn’t buy very much fresh produce because we weren’t home consistently enough to eat it before it spoiled. Now that we are into a regular routine, it is time to get back on the “real food diet.”

How we eat affects our energy level, our health, and our attitude. We spoke about this concept this summer at Camp Elijah. I taught in chapel about putting the right things into our bodies. I asked the campers what would happen to them if they only ate junk food all the time. I said the same principle applies to what we put into our mind. What comes out of my mouth and my thoughts is directly related to what goes in. It’s important  to watch what I put before my eyes. This is integrity.

Recently, one of the students who was at camp this summer spoke to me about the issue of integrity. He brought up what I had taught this summer. I was thrilled that what I had spoken about then has apparently sunk in with at least one camper. At the same time, I was deeply humbled. I became aware of the fact that me and my family are being watched to see if our lives agree with what we taught at camp.

This made me think. Am I putting the right things in? I am currently cleaning out the cupboards and refrigerator in order to fill them with healthy things, things that contain life. Is it time to do the same with my mind? I need to find more life-giving content to fill my soul. We recently decided to quit watching a TV program that we have been following for a couple of years. We saw that if we want to live lives of integrity, it is time to clean out the junk. That way when others look at our life, everything will add up. Our private life will match the public. That’s integrity.

 

It’s Not Easy Being Green

I try. I really do. I want to recycle and be responsible about my environment. I promise I have good intentions. Sometimes. But there are so many decisions. How far do I go? At what point do I become a green fanatic? I don’t want to make myself crazy. I read that a responsible mom would use cloth diapers. I thought about it…for about ten seconds. I’d rather fill the landfill than fill my washing machine.

I drank a bottle of water today. I stood over the trash can debating. What should I do with the bottle? I don’t have a recycling box yet. If I throw it away it will end up in some poor sea mammal’s home. A manatee might swallow it. It will stay there for 800 years. Do I want that on my head? But if I save it, where do I put it? I could pile the bottles underneath the sink until I can take them to the recycling center. Here I imagined Gabriel opening up the cabinet door (he likes to open and shut the kitchen cupboards for fun) and being buried in bottles and cans at which point I promptly threw the bottle in the regular trash can and forgot about it.

Last week I was buying groceries. “Paper or plastic?” the cashier asked. I hesitated… If I say plastic, she’ll think I don’t care about the environment. I pictured thousands of plastic bags abandoned in our local dump, destined to stay there for generations. If I choose plastic I will have to make sure I recycle them. Oh, but I never remember to take them back to the store…Should I choose paper? I remembered reading that it takes a lot of energy and resources to recycle a paper bag. Is paper the better choice? Why do I even care this much? All I really need is something to carry my groceries from the car to the kitchen. Why don’t I ever remember my reusable bags? After what seemed like minutes of internal dialogue, which in reality was probably only a few seconds, I blurted out, “Paper!”

Mr. Al Gore, I’m sorry. My standards of living probably don’t live up to what you have dreamed for America. However, I promise that if you give me some of the profits you are making off of global warming I will take a bigger interest in saving the planet also. Until then, I will go on throwing my pop can in the trash when there is no recycling bin available, using a garbage disposal instead of making my own compost pile, and caring more about my son’s footprint than my carbon footprint. He’s more important anyway.

 

The Prison of Self-Esteem

“You must love yourself before you can love anyone else.”

“By thinking positive thoughts, your life will produce a positive outcome.”

“Only you are in charge of your destiny. You control your world.”

Do any of these sound familiar? These are things we hear over and over from our teachers, mentors, our favorite celebrities, and “experts.” We are told that we must love ourselves and truly know who we are before we are ready to conquer life’s obstacles. We hear of people spending their time, energy, and money in order to “find themselves.”

We tell children in school that they are “special.” The thinking is that children must feel like they each are the best in order to succeed. Everybody always wins and each child is special in his or her own special way. This begs the question: If six billion people are each special, why the emphasis? Does not “special” become “ordinary”?

If the world is telling us that we should be happy by loving ourselves, why are we all miserable? Why does the pursuit of material things, success, or fame leave us wanting more? I think the answer lies outside of ourselves.

Jesus told us the right way to live, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength…Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these,” (Mark 12:30-31). We are commanded to love our neighbor as we love our self, not to learn to love our self first and then turn to our neighbor. I think Jesus knew that we would have no trouble loving our self first. We may not always like who we are, but most of us have no trouble providing for our own needs above others. Do we really need more self-love?

I am definitely not against feeling good about yourself. But when I waste my time trying to build up my self-esteem by loving only myself I am not happy. I will never be happy if I only try to make peace with who I am or if I am always trying to “find myself.” True happiness comes from serving others. When I look beyond myself to see the hurting people around me and allow compassion for others to rule my actions, only then will I find happiness and purpose. We need to stop focusing on who we are trying to become and instead focus on who we can encourage. Who can we comfort with an encouraging word? Where can we lend a hand?

Instead of creating a generation of self-focused kids we should be encouraging children to find fulfillment in helping others. Instead of an endless search for good self-esteem and love, we should encourage acts of selflessness. Therein lies true happiness.

 

Perspectives

I wish I could see the world through Gabriel’s eyes. Simple things are amazing to a one-year-old. Everyday is an adventure and I love seeing him explore his world. This summer Tim and I showed Gabriel how to pick raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries. The cutest thing I have ever seen is a toddling baby picking raspberries off a bush and eating them. He reaches out his grubby little fingers, picks a slightly-ripe berry off the bush and shoves it in his mouth. I can tell that he is so proud of himself whenever he can do something independently. However, I do hope that he won’t pick just any berries he finds and eat them.

We are currently visiting my family in Iowa. My mother has an extensive flower garden with a variety of plants. My sister and I had to laugh as Gabriel would enter one end of the garden and walk in-between the plants and flowers on his unsteady legs and try to find a path to the other side. Of course, he was barefoot and would squeal whenever he stepped on anything that was not very forgiving on his tender feet. Most of the plants are taller than him; in his eyes he must have been exploring a wild jungle.

He is teaching me to be more observant, to take my time. I am learning that every puppy must be petted, every flower needs to be smelled and handled, and apples should be picked and fed to any animal that will eat them (cow, dog or cat). I love seeing Gabriel’s face when we come across something new, such as a cornfield. He scrunches his brow as he feels the texture of the stalk. I pick some and pull back the husk so he can see the yellow pellets. He runs his finger across it scanning his memory, trying to connect it with something familiar. I can tell that he recognizes the corn, it is one of the few vegetables that he will eat, but he can’t figure out why it is on an ear like that. He tastes it, says something to himself in jibberish, and then todders away to see what other adventures Grandma’s backyard has in store for him.

 

 

Redemption Is Here

Shock. Anger. Pain. Sadness. These have been our emotions over the last week. Followed by numbness. Acceptance. Celebration. And joy. The tragic death of a young friend of ours. Alex was 16. Taken suddenly. Traumatically. He was a wonderful part of our ministry. We hurt for ourselves. For his family. We hurt for his friends, our friends, as we try to deal with the pain. Wait. You may wonder. How is celebration included. Where is joy? The answer: Redemption.

God understands suffering. He sent His own son to earth. To die. For us. God knows mourning. God understands our pain. But, He can bring redemption. He will bring redemption. Jesus suffered. Died. But rose again! There is the redemption. A tragic situation. A painful death. Yet God brought good. That is redemption. God turned horror into salvation. Jesus brings life where there is death. Suffering turns into glory.

We suffer. The tragic death of a friend. The loss of a job. A loved one dies to cancer. Natural disasters take thousands. Parents divorce. Our spouses disappoint us. Our children turn away from us. Our friends desert us. Where is God? He is right there. In the midst of it all. Redemption must follow suffering. Jesus had to die. Salvation must follow death. In our weakness. He is strong.

We are drawn to God through suffering. Without pain, we wouldn’t know Him. Or His comfort. It is there that true redemption happens. God takes ugliness. He turns it into beauty. We suffer now. But we can see His work. It’s happening. All around us. He is working. His redemption is coming!

We have experienced joy. Through Alex’s death, we have seen life. We have celebrated. Life through death. Life in Christ. Life in Heaven. Even now. Our dear friend is truly living. We suffer for ourselves. But not for Alex. We envy his proximity to God. We celebrate his life. We show others. God is brought close. He is seen by those who haven’t seen before. He is accepted. He is invited.

Through Alex’s death, life is accomplished. That is redemption.

 

 

Theology 101

I have just completed a year-long course in Theology. I didn’t sign up for it; I didn’t even realize I was taking it until I was near the end. I have taken several theology courses throughout my academic career, but I learned more in the last year as a mother than I learned in all those college courses combined. My baby boy just turned one year old. Wow! I can hardly believe it. I thank God for my son. He has brought me so much joy and purpose. But unexpectedly, he has taught me so much about my Heavenly Father; I thank God for that too. I know that the education doesn’t stop here after one year, but I want to look back and see again the new ways I have experienced God:

Before Gabriel was born, I loved him. I felt his kick within me and I was filled with such a great love that I would have sacrificed my own life in order to bring him into the world. As soon as I saw him him and held him for the first time I was filled with such a fierce love and feeling of protectiveness that I would have moved the earth for him. If I am able to give such love (frail and incapable human that I am), why do I doubt my Father’s love for me? His love is so much deeper than I can imagine. I can see a glimpse of that now.

I would give Gabriel anything. I make sure that his needs are met even if it means that I will do without. I would not deny him a meal just because I don’t feel like preparing anything. Why do I think my Father will not provide for me the things I need? Why do I feel that I need to do everything by myself for myself so that I will not go hungry or be without shelter? My God promises that even the birds will have their needs met. He has always provided for me. Yet again and again when I feel a need, I strive to reach it on my own. Now I am learning to trust Him more.

It takes a while for Gabriel to learn some things. Of course, he is a baby so I don’t expect him to know everything about life right now. However, he really seems to have a knack for getting himself hurt. The fifteenth time that I tell him not to climb out of his high chair and sit him back down, I try to do it as patiently as I did the first time. Sometimes I fail and get a little frustrated with him for repeatedly putting himself in harm’s way. But my Heavenly Father never loses patience with me. The eighty-seventh time that I do something stupid and put myself in a position to get hurt He patiently shows me the right way again and lovingly brings me back into a right relationship with Him. Why do I feel like He has a limit to His forgiveness? Why do I feel that if I mess up one too many times He will give up on me? He won’t. He can’t. His character denies the possibility. I have a deeper understanding of His patient love now.

My son has shown me the Father in ways I never could have imagined. It is my prayer that as he grows I can turn that around and lead him in the path to his Heavenly Father. There he will find unconditional love where his earthly parents falter, God’s provision where we fail, and patience where we react sharply.

I look forward to what Gabriel will teach me in his second year. Maybe this year will be filled with less bumps, bruises, spills, and pinched fingers. Maybe this year we will be able to breathe a little easier as our Gabe grows. But knowing my son…I doubt it.

 

Live Like a King?

One day while we were moving into our new place in the UP, I found a box of books in the basement. I can never pass up a box of old books. Among the various books, was one titled, Live Like a King, by Warren Wiersbe. I was amazed to find such a book on the Beatitudes, just when we are studying and teaching the exact same topic this summer for camp. The book was a joy to read, and I appreciated Wiersbe’s pastoral approach to a tough group of verses. The chapter on Matthew 5:4 was one of my favorites. What does Jesus mean by saying that we’ll be blessed when we’re sad?

Wiersbe begins by talking about how what we laugh and cry about really shows our true character. I think of Gabe and what he laughs and cries about. Just the other day we were sitting at the table together when Emily’s chair fell apart and she dropped to the floor. Gabriel thought it was pretty hilarious. Also, when I pick Emily up and dance around with her, Gabriel will sometimes start crying and getting upset. I’m sure in the case of Gabe, it is a matter of maturity rather than a character flaw, but some people’s humor or sadness can be even more misplaced than a child’s.

One story we keep going back to as we study and prepare to teach the Beatitudes is the story of the prodigal son. There is a prime example of a youth who had to learn about mourning sin. In his book, Wiersbe writes about true repentance as a part of our mourning over the bad things we do. As a true pastor, he puts forth the three ‘R’s of godly mourning to show how mourning should affect our mind, heart, and will. If the prodigal son sat in the pig filth and only thought of how foolish he had been, that would be regret. If he thought of his sins and began to hate himself for the poor choices, that would only be remorse. The prodigal son was able to say, “I will arise and go!” – and he actually got up and went. That was when true repentance was evident in his life. He went home and found exactly what he was looking for.

I must leave you with two of my favorite examples of mourners in the Bible. It is funny, but in a way, it is sad that we really don’t show the same emotion over the horrid nature of sin. Both Ezra and Nehemiah were so upset about sin in the Israelite community that they became hair-pullers. Ezra pulled out his hair from all over his head, even his beard got involved. Nehemiah, on the other hand, got so upset about sin he beat people and pulled out their hair and not his own. I’m not saying we should become hair-pullers for Jesus, but maybe we should be more willing to show people that everything is really not okay. As we teach these Beatitudes to the youth, we like to share the opposite “Bad-attitude.” In this case it would go something like this: You’re sad when you act like everything is okay instead of admitting when you’re wrong or hurt; you’ll be depressed and discouraged. I like the way of the kingdom better: You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you (Matt. 5:4, Message).

-Tim

 

8 Ways To Be

If I could give you eight principles that would guarantee happiness, would you follow them? I think a more likely response would be to scoff and roll your eyes. In our culture we see many so-called Secrets to Happiness; we become cynical about attaining happiness. So many claim to have the secret, yet no one is truly happy.

As it happens, I do know the eight secrets, let’s call them attitudes, to happiness. I learned them at Elijah Bible Camp this last week. I didn’t come up with them, my Savior did. I’m sure you’ve heard of them:

“You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you    there is more of God and his rule.

You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are- no more no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.

You’re blessed when you’ve worked up a good appetite for God. He’s food and drink in the best meal you’ll ever eat.

You’re blessed when you care. At the moment of being ‘carefull,” you find yourselves cared for.

You’re blessed when you get your inside world–your mind and heart–put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.

You’re blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God’s kingdom.”

(Matthew 5:2-10, The Message)

I think that I’ve only heard this passage of Scripture preached on maybe twice ever. Is it because it contains such complicated paradoxes? Perhaps. But I think that means it needs to preached all the more. Jesus guarantees that if we have these attitudes we will be blessed, deeply and truly happy. Wow, how can we not want to study these? Not only that, but Jesus continues, saying that through this kind of life others will see you and be drawn to God. My challenge for myself this summer is to not just read through Matthew 5, say Amen and move on. But to study it, hide it in my heart and let the Holy Spirit manifest His attitudes in me. May the Lord bless you as well.

~Emily

 

Gabriel Braden

As a proud father, I just have to blog about my son, Gabriel. He is such a ham! It’s been pretty much non-stop up here with the playing and the eating and the chasing after Dora. Gabriel has only two settings, off and full speed ahead. He climbs stairs just as fast as he can, seeing any sort of obstacle as a mountain to climb. Just yesterday he took three steps towards me as he was up on a box by the window. He wasn’t concerned about the drop off. We tried to block him off from the kitchen with a box, but he just stepped into it and then got back out on the other side. I don’t know where all the energy comes from. I hope that God will use all his energy and determination as he grows up in the Lord. I’ve been reading about Nehemiah and his determination with building the wall of Jerusalem, and I can see that same determination in Gabriel. In Nehemiah 6, Nehemiah tells the opposition, “I am doing a great work, and I can’t come down.” I could see Gabriel telling me that as he speeds towards Dora’s food dish or heads for the staircase in order to climb all the stairs for the 6^th time. With all this energy, we are definitely praying and hoping that Gabriel stays out of trouble this week at camp. If we don’t watch, he will be off in the woods making friends with all the woodland creatures. I have enjoyed seeing Gabriel make his home here and watching as he lets himself be heard. I think this wide-open country fits nice with Gabriel’s character. Praise God that he made a nice transition!